Inner journeys

I have wanted very much to keep in touch but for a great part of the last couple weeks I was just not feeling in the mood. I actually have spent much time close to 'home', trying to get out to local parks so Django can see other kids at a playground, or riding the bus up to Muswell Hill where we can get our organic foods. For several days I had extremely low energy verging on exhaustion, and some spells of mild nausea (no, I'm not pregnant). Other than those symptoms, I didn't feel ill. It's gone by and I feel fine now. I have no idea what it was.

I was also feeling very adrift, and was missing Los Angeles where I lived for almost 18 years before moving to Port Townsend, Washington. I think I was missing the place where I had more established things: friends, work, activity. I was also imagining that special Southern California weather, with magical golden light and warm jasmine and orange blossom scented evenings... (of course it's not always like that, but that's the BEST weather).

I have also been missing my father, who I have called by his first name, Bob, since I was five. He's Bob to me. He passed away on August 31st, a mere two months ago. We started traveling two weeks after he died. As much as I thought it would hit me when I arrived in Denmark and settled, it seemed distant, perhaps because I was distant. I could have just been away, could have just not talked for a few weeks. But as I write these journals, and send them out and get responses from many friends and family, his response is starkly absent. I know he would be writing me back about every post. I know he would be encouraging and happy for our adventure. I know it will take time for the reality and the permanence of this loss to be really felt.

Bob was so always so supportive of me and my creative pursuits, and was also very supportive of Simon and his music. Now when Simon has a record label behind him and things are really starting to happen, I wish we could share this with him. Perhaps in some way he knows and is present.


Bob in January 2009 with his Tomte (a mythical protective creature from Scandinavia)




I've had my energy back for several days, so I've been able to get out a bit, and Simon was back after 5 days out touring.
Regular travel blog to resume soon.
There will be one more post about London before Django and I head to Poland on Thursday! We'll be visiting with my cousin Dominique who is living in Warsaw. Simon will join us there 5 days later after a trip to Sweden to play two shows.